Okay, here's the first of the 2012 posts, a tad bit overdue in my own eyes, but it's been crazy busy. I'll write about a few of the experiences I've had this week at a later time (hopefully by next week). However, for now, onward and...well, at least onward.
The past few weeks, we've been encouraged to start keeping a spiritual journal. I've been somewhat ambivalent towards the whole thing. I like journaling, but it's a matter of being consistent. I suppose it's somewhat like blogging, but it requires more dedication. To an extent, I also suppose I have a stubborn streak (imagine that), as well as being somewhat resistant to being told what to do, even if it's the mildest suggestion. Yes, I'm a seminarian and I'm somewhat resistant to authority. So, you ask, what business do I have being a seminarian? Well, I do my best to conform my heart and will to God's will. Many times it's not easy, as I have to overcome my own wants and desires. Also, it won't hurt me to gain more humility, as I can be pretty egotistical at times. That's something I'm working on too. Anyway, as for a spiritual journal, there are several benefits to keeping one: reflecting daily on what has happened (or what you pray and hope will happen), it's a form of prayer, you can gain understanding of what you've grown in and what you need to continue to grow in, and gaining a deeper understanding of oneself as a whole person.
On the other hand, I'm still struggling with it because I think to myself, "I already reflect on my day, I know what I've grown in and what I need to work on, and I do understand myself more now than I did even just 6 months ago." And yet, I know that's my pride talking. So that's one of the struggles going on right now, even though it is a small one. I know the philosophy of "Don't worry about the small stuff", but the small stuff makes up the big stuff. And in spirituality, we have to worry about the small stuff, even if it's just picking ourselves back up again and working on ways to grow in holiness. If we don't we'll slip and slide until we find we're in a place we never thought we'd be. Please pray for me as I strive to grow in holiness, and I'm praying for all of you as well. I also have a few questions, so, if you choose to answer, great, if not, no worries. Do you have a spiritual journal? If so, was it hard to convince yourself to keep one? If not, have you ever thought of keeping one? Any comments are always appreciated, have a great night. And to close it out, I think I'll share Slow Fade by Casting Crowns.
I haven't had a spiritual journal, and I haven't really thought of having one... I think mine would be very convoluted and confused with moments of clarity, though! While I think it would be neat for me to have one, I don't know what I would put in one.
ReplyDeleteI have thought of starting one years ago, but with the family and work, it seemed mundane because everyday seemed like Bill Murhy and Groundhog Day. So you definately aren't the only one with the same thoughts about a journal. It might be easier for some just to collect what they put on facebook everyday. They sure put their life out there.
ReplyDeletePraying for you and your decisions.
Great Funeral Burial service, thank you.
I kept one starting in college and I quit doing it regularly about ten years later, when I got married. I kept it by my bed and my routine was to pray/journal after I got in bed but before turning out the light. Marriage changed my bedtime routine and I just never found the right time to continue journaling, though I've made a couple of attempts over the years.
ReplyDeleteWhile I was doing it, journaling was my prayer time. I'd read something from scripture and then basically write a letter to God about it,my day, whatever. As with many people, those years were filled with a lot of decisions and a lot of changes. I still have a lot of those old books in boxes in the garage. I was thumbing through them one day and realizing how much I've forgotten over the years. I also realized how selective my memory can be. I was an education major, who, as I like to say, spent four years of college knowing she wanted to be a teacher and two years of real life finding out that she didn't. When I look back on my student teaching days, the memories are mostly good; when I look back on my real life days teaching, the memories aren't. I saw a journal entry from my student teaching days "The kids were loud and I was a bitch, what else is new"--so evidently those days weren't as idyllic as I remember.
Another advantage of journaling is that it gives me something to do. With pen to paper, writing my questions, my feelings, my insights, I stay focused on prayer much better than I do without it.